"'Scuse me miss, I know this ain't your fault, but I am fuckin' LIT." Great, please continue! I can't wait to... not be able to solve your problem!
He's upset that his room doesn't have a hot tub, but instead a bathtub with whirlpool jets. Since he booked through a third party (think Expedia), who can do what they want, this is not anything we can control. He proceeded to rant about the lack of hot tub for a few minutes, every now and then interrupting himself to reiterate that "I know this ain't your fault." After I said I'd figure out how to refund his money, he started walking away and said "Good, 'cause I'm PISSED, and I'm 'bout to start drankin', and it's just gon' git worse." How exciting!
Resolution: I called his room 30 minutes later with "Sir, I can get you a refund if-" (90 seconds of him jabbering about the problem) "Yes, I understand, and I'm so sorry that happened. If you-" (120 seconds of jabbering about how I need to tell his girl he wasn't mean to me) "Ha ha, I'll tell her. So to get the refund-" (45 seconds of jabbering about his baked potato at dinner*) "I'm sorry it's been a rough night. CallExpediaandgettherefundhaveagoodnight."
Line of the night: "I know you're just a receptionist..." I will hit you in the face with my law degree. I'm not using it for anything.
*I shit you not. He did NOT make it clear that the potato was not my fault. It may have been.
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